Family Feud
Well, for a while now, my family has slowly been breaking apart, those problems you hear about suddenly becoming your problems, and it seems we’ve come to a new Low Point.
Due to a really petty squabble between my sister (wh had been growing more intolerant of my mother the pst few days) and my mother (who’s been increasingly unstable), ended in a fight, pretty much a cat fight, with my sister almost breaking my mom’s face open. She kept calling my mom an ‘asshole’ (hueeón in spanish, it’s the closes I could translate), and mom calling her a bitch in return. I’d rather not go into more detil, bt my mom told her to get out of the house, and she did, after a few more tantrum scenes and throwing books out the window and making a neighbor’s car start sounding it’s alarm.
Once my sister left, mom called the cops to denounce my sister for family abuse, and is now in the hospital with a friend. I stayed behind to care for my 6 year old brother, and two kids about my sister’s age that are staying over.
This is all too much… and frankly I have no idea how to handle it… What am I supposed to do? i know my sister was out of line, and frankly I feel she shouldn’t have called my mother the way she did, nor hit her (even if mom slapped her first, tired of being called an asshole by my sister).
Things have gotten this bad, mostly due to our financial situation. Mom’s without a job, dad’s paying pretty much no child support, and mom’s got to feed all three of us (at least till I go back to Santiago). She definetly doesn’t have money and is doing miracles to keep us fed (heck, her FRIENDS bring boxes of food to help her >.<).
Yes, I do feel guilty that I’m no help, if at least I try not to aggravate the situation helping out where I can about the house. But much more than that I dunno what to do. I had plans for making two webpages to pay for my own stuff, now I’m just wanting to get them done to help my mom out with this month’s bills, or we’ll have no electricity (or internet). Let alone food.
It just seems like everything’s crumbling down suddenly around us, and I really don’t know how to stop it. Instead I end up shutting it all away and dedicating more and more hours to being on the net, with friends, and just…. forgetting about it all for as long as possible. Mostly because I see no way to fix it, and I couldn’t stand worrying about it uselessly all day.
I’m a naturally depression-prone person, lke my mother, so I try to shuffle things, creative outlets, that can make me deal with stuff I’m passing through. Heck, my life’s just been going downhill for over a year now, and most people wouldn’t really realize this. I’m not the kind of person that admits to everything they’re going through is affecting them. I just say I’m doing fine, and leave it at that. Even to friends and family. I don’t really know how to let people help me I guess.
I dunno what will happen tomorrow, if I’ll be able to get on, or I’ll be busy with the next chapter in this drama between my sister and mom. I usually am on my sister’s comp, and if she takes it away…. well…. yeah, it’ll be difficult to get on. Not to mention no drawing on comp till I go back to my place.
Hopefully though, I’ll be on a t a more reasonable time, and not 5am, and will be able to talk to someone, a friend or something…. because while I’d really rather have a real shoulder to cry on, I suppose an electronic hug is better than nothing.
I guess in that I’m glad, mom *does* have friends here. Friends that even when woken up at 4am come rushing over to give her a hug. The one I can’t give her because I also feel alienated from her, and yes, a bit scared too.
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